Guaranteed to make you feel clever …

Normally we stick to music related things on this blog, but we got sent a great email today from our friends over at MacKing which we felt we just had to share.  It’s guaranteed to make you laugh and feel a bit clever (which surely has to be a good thing for a Thursday).

BRAINS OF BRITAIN . . . (these are real examples)

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman:   What is another name for ‘cherrypickers’ and ‘cheesemongers’?
Contestant: Homosexuals.
Jeremy Paxman: No. They’re regiments in the British Army, who will be very upset with you.

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL (BBC2)
Jamie Theakston: Where do you think Cambridge University is?
Contestant: Geography isn’t my strong point.
Jamie Theakston: There’s a clue in the title.
Contestant: Leicester

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don’t know.
Stewart White:  I’ll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant: Arm
Stewart White: Correct. And if you’re not weak, you’re…?
Contestant: Strong.
Stewart White: Correct – and what was Lord Mountbatten’s first name?
Contestant:  Louis
Stewart White: Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS )
Alex Trelinski: What is the capital of Italy ?
Contestant: France.
Trelinski: France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski: Wrong, sorry, let’s try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant: Sorry, I don’t know.
Trelinski: Just guess a country then.
Contestant: Paris.

THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson:  Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: – Prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant: The Conservative Party.

BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )
DJ Mark: For 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Contestant: I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
Bamber Gascoyne: What was Gandhi’s first name?
Contestant: Goosey?

GWR FM ( Bristol )
Presenter:  What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant: I don’t know, I wasn’t watching it then.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC RADIO  MANCHESTER)
Phil: What’s 11 squared?
Contestant:     I don’t know.
Phil: I’ll give you a clue. It’s two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant: Is it five?

RICHARD AND JUDY
Richard: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
Contestant:  Forrest Gump.

RICHARD AND JUDY
Richard: On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant: Er. … ….
Richard: He makes bread . . …
Contestant: Er .. …….
Richard: He makes cakes . . …
Contestant: Kipling Street?

LINCS FM PHONE-IN
Presenter:  Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter:  I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant:  I’m sorry, I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain …

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Question: What is the world’s largest continent?
Contestant: The Pacific.

ROCK FM ( PRESTON )
Presenter:  Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of   a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.
Contestant:  Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)
Steve Le Fevre: What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
Contestant: Magna Carta?

JAMES O’BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
James O’Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth … ER. ER … Three?

CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL )
Chris Searle:  In which European country is Mount Etna ?
Caller:  Japan.
Chris Searle:  I did say which European country, so in case you didn’t hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller:  Er …….. Mexico ?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE )
Paul Wappat: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (long pause): Fourteen days.

DARYL DENHAM’S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant: Holland?
Daryl Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland ?
Daryl Denham: (helpfully) It’s a bad line. Did you say Israel ?
Contestant: No.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
Phil Wood: What ‘K’ could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant:  Er… …. …
Phil Wood:   It’s got two syllables . . . Kor . .
Contestant:  Blimey?
Phil Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . . ..
Contestant: (Silence)
Phil Wood:  OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .
Contestant: Walked?

THE VAULT
Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
Contestant: Nostalgia.

STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?
Contestant: Jesus.